In the evening time, when I am tired, sometimes the voice in my head starts being a dick. I think I am reflecting on the day, but what I end up doing is just telling myself I did something wrong today. It doesn’t matter what the event is, I must have messed it up. I also start to think, your actions are bad or malevolent. It is due to that negative programming that happened during childhood. It is something I need to face sometimes, to figure out what is triggering it, and then let it go. What I mean by letting go is that I see the pattern, and say to myself – you’re doing this again, love yourself, be kind to yourself. When I recognize this, I am teaching myself to see that it is just BS nonsense and my brain just needs to chill. When I am tired, hungry, or overwhelmed with sensory input, then this has a higher chance of occurring. Not only do I need to recognize when this is happening, but I have to make sure I take care of myself and try to avoid it. Things I do are eating well (listening to what my body needs), meditating regularly, spending time with close friends, family, listening to music, playing music, being in nature or in our around water. In essence, these things allow me to recognize I am not a separate being but connected to all (the universe) and forces me to see/feel it at that needed moment. I then pay attention to the connections than to the silliness in my head.
