It’s not a relationship, it’s just a job. However, this perspective can be difficult to maintain when your family relies on your salary, too. It adds weight to every decision regarding work. So, in my case, I have been with the same company for more than 20 years. However, the…
Category: Entry
Hiding Abuse
After my father’s fun texting, I was thinking about my relationship with my father and particularly “the elephant in the room”. The reason this came to my mind was that I was reflecting on how he responded to me via text, and what I plan to do next to avoid…
Compensating for Callousness
When I talk with anyone in the service industry (waitstaff, customer service, etc.) or caregivers (nurses, teachers, therapists, etc.) I find myself exceptionally kind and giving. For the most part this is a great thing – most people want to be treated with kindness and if you provide a generous…
Dealing with My Father’s Abuse
This has been a long road with repetition of pain. My father for one moment would be my best friend and shower me with praise, and then the next moment would suppress all “love” and be really nasty and abusive. Growing up with this as a child, I would feel…
Depression
The past couple months, I have noticed I have depression and it has been increasing (at least I can notice and identify it now). In the past, I never recognized or admitted I was depressed, but that this is just what life is like, and I can just push through…
The Fork in the Road
I was meditating this morning, and the meditation guide first spoke about constant compassion – where we want to always offer kindness and compassion without any expectation of others. This makes sense to me (see my giving entry) as it is what I try for. I was thinking further and…
We are all connected
I was thinking about how we are all connected to each other, and why some people can sense this connection and others can’t or even think it is impossible. There also seems to be differing magnitudes of sensitivity that each of us possess. For example, I feel connected to other…
The Gift of Anxiety
Oh boy, where do I start on this one? Well, I start with my view on anxiety. Anxiety is our body’s natural protective response to fear. For example, if I am being chased by a lion, tiger, or bear (oh my!), I am going to flee. I won’t even think…
Open Mic Night
Fuck yea! I went to my first open mic night (it was held in my town), and it was awesome! The audience and performers were fabulous. There were so many nice and unique people to talk with. When I signed in at the door, I was given a performance number(…
Giving
My daughter made this drawing for me that says “May you give love and get love”. She said you say it all the time. It touched my heart when she shared this with me! Giving is something that is very important to me. Giving is an act of love and…